As I go further from the person I was, I find myself more and more just bewildered at the audacity of most men. I’m going to try very hard to not turn this into a rant against an entire population of people and yes, there are plenty of good men out there, but the whole concept of “what makes a man” in this society and what comes with it is just baffling.
I’ve been living full time as female for a little over 3 months now and have been medically transitioning for twice that amount of time. I’m far enough along in my transition that I am more often than not, perceived as female by strangers. I technically was never male but I was raised as one and some of the things that you hear when other members of the club think you’re one of them just can’t be uttered, it really is a club and slightly less than 50% of the population is part of it. Now that I’m seeing the entire other side of that, at least in my experiences, I’ve quickly learned that one of the only differences between a good man and a pig is what they let you hear them say when nobody else is around. Actions speak louder than words and what’s left unsaid fills volumes. Every action and the environment that it occurs in comes with more substance than even the densest material in the universe. Things that are tossed aside as “boys will be boys” says nobody else’s experiences matter and fuck whoever says different.
“Oh, that boy harassed that little girl so much that she ended up crying? Well, boys will be boys and the fact that they made her cry means nothing to me.”
“Oh, that grown ass man just had sex with that girl who was unconscious? Well, boys will be boys, of course he can’t control himself and a woman falling asleep is just asking to be raped, right?”
THIS SHIT DOESN’T HELP ANYBODY!!!!!!!!!! Just, GAH! JESUS FUCK! This shit is what we’re telling our kids. We’re telling our boys they can’t be trusted and can get away with anything as long as it’s against a woman and we’re telling women that they’re objects to be subjugated and they don’t matter. By not holding people accountable we’re dooming future generations to a world of toxicity and a cycle of sexual violence AND ENOUGH PEOPLE WERE ABLE TO VOTE THE VERY MODEL OF A BAD EXAMPLE INTO OFFICE!!!
Some entitled, white, cis het, male dick hole I used to know posted several videos after the election with people saying that the reason the Head Prostate was elected was because of us “social justice warriors” but how does a population of people calling other people out on this shit get one of them elected to the highest office in the land? These same entitled sperm dumpers go around and get their dicks bent into a pretzel after we ask them to kindly NOT be terrible. Even worse, some say ‘oh sure’ with a smile then go behind our backs and demean us to the next person they fucking see. How is any of this okay? When did teaching your AMAB kids to respect others become a massive act of rebellion?
People from all walks of life can be terrible. These things aren’t isolated to just the male population, but that type of entitlement is something that is solely saved for cis het males. There’s going to be plenty of people telling me “not all men” and getting pissed at saying this but all I can say to that is take those hashtags and shove them straight up your urethra cause I’m not hearing it right now. You want to show that it’s not all men? Prove it, prevention starts with you. If you’re with your buddies on a guy’s night, how about you tell them they’re being fucking terrible. If you see a man rub up against a woman or show any form of unwanted attention, how about you tell them to knock it the fuck off because they’re sure as hell not going to acknowledge it from us. You’re afraid of getting your teeth knocked in for speaking up? We get fucking murdered for it.
This is a call to action for all men who think they’re allies, either be an ally or stop lying to yourself and others. Guys, just stop being terrible, it’s not hard.
Step 1: listen to someone when they tell you you’re wrong or what you did hurt them, you won’t be any less a man for it.
Step 2: Once you hear someone say you are wrong and what you did was inappropriate, actually consider the crazy possibility that maybe you were in the wrong. Don’t turn around and say we are over reacting for bringing your terrible shit to your attention.
Step 3: Continue to not be a dick.
That’s it! Three simple rules, listen, acknowledge, and don’t be a dick. If you’re really tired of society and you want to hit the status quo where it hurts? How about you stop subscribing to the bullshit it represent. How about you actually listen to us when we say you’re wrong. If you still think it’s political correctness or being an “SJW” that caused this mess, then kindly get hit by a bus cause this girl’s had it. I know I said I was going to try to not turn this into a rant against an entire population but guys, you make it really hard.